My niece is driving me crazy!

sheilajim · Post by **sheilajim** » Sun Feb 15, 2009 9:24 pm

Hi All

I don't know if anybody else has had this problem. My niece has been bugging me for some time to put the family tree together. I have tried to tell her that I need more time to get more information.

I plan to write up in detail as much as I can, about not only our 'old rellies' but the life and times that they lived in. I would like to put in more than just BMD. To do this I need more information. (I was hoping that the Kirk Session Records would come online soon for more info.) I would also like to learn more about the Social History of their times.

These things also take time to do, at least for me. I have been writing about my mother and my family as we grew up and it is taking me a long time to do this. After all, I don't to it 24/7. Genealogy and family history is a hobby, not a job. I have other things to do. She thinks that I should have written everything about everybody down by now.

To get her off my back, I gave her a printout of our Family Tree. Maybe that wasn't such a good idea. She keeps calling me asking who this is and is confused because so many of the people have the same name. She is even getting me confused. Scottish Naming Patterns can be confusing to the uninitiated.

I suppose that I should be glad that my niece has taken an interest in my Genealogy hobby. She is really a very nice person and I am very fond of her..But.. I hate having to leave my dinner, etc. to answer some question she has at the moment.

Of course she doesn't know that I am eating or doing something else when she calls.

Any suggestions about what I should do. Has anyone else come across a problem like this? Am I the one who is being unreasonable?

Please forgive this rant of mine.

LesleyB · Post by **LesleyB** » Sun Feb 15, 2009 9:57 pm

Hi Sheila
It is great that your niece is interested, but I do think that if you are eating your dinner or involved in something else when she wants to discuss things in detail, that you tell her, in the nicest possible way, that it is not a convenient time for you just now and arrange a time for her to call back later!

Best wishes
Lesley

Post by **Anne H** » Sun Feb 15, 2009 9:59 pm

Hi Sheila,

I'd love it if any of my relatives took such an interest and actually called me up asking questions...as it is, they like to hear and read about it but that's as far as it goes.

Why not put your niece to task and take one generation at time and ask her to get on the internet, etc. and help to gather some background information for the social history side of things...might be fun for her to contribute!

...and when she calls during dinner, tell her you just sat down to eat and you'll call her back.

Regards,
Anne H

WilmaM · Post by **WilmaM** » Mon Feb 16, 2009 12:15 am

Tell her to email you the questions!

and Anne's sugestion of putting her to work is great too, get her interest working for you and farm out the research tasks .

My teenage daughter occasionally asks about various bits of 'the tree' but my eldest son [11] loves the old maps and finding the places I'm talking about - his name is Andrew, must be something in the name!

Post by **emanday** » Mon Feb 16, 2009 12:31 am

Hi Sheila,

I can understand your frustration at your niece's persistent nagging and inconvenient calls, but I also envy you

My son and daughter are mildly interested, but I know to shut up when their eyes start to glaze over

However, having seen how much I've achieved (so far) researching my own Scottish roots, my son-in-law has become really enthusiastic about finding out more about his English family history and he really tries to help as much as he can. OK, he can sometimes ring right in the middle of my favourite program or as I'm just about to step into a nicely warm bath but, what the hey, we can't have everything

Post by **paddyscar** » Mon Feb 16, 2009 1:54 am

Hi Sheila:

I'm with Anne H - put her to work looking for background info. If she has a special interest, such as cooking or sewing or other craft, set her off to do some searching on her area of interest for different eras and that should give her something to focus on, and something to add to the background.

Frances

sheilajim · Post by **sheilajim** » Mon Feb 16, 2009 2:18 am

Hi All.

Thanks to everyone for your input. You have given me an idea.

My niece is not interested nor good at researching things, that is not her forte.
As far as I am concerned the research is the fun. My niece, however, is very good at organizing things, something that I am not at all good at. You should see the mess of papers, pictures, maps, etc. , even the stuff that I have on the computer is a mess.

I think that I will invite her over to help me organize everything. That way she can help me and I can show and tell her everything that I know at the present time.

I am really glad that this niece has taken an interest into our family history. Especially since she is my favorite niece. It would be nice if her son took an interest when he got older but right now he is very young.

Most of my family is only politely interested. My sister is mildly interested. She asks me if I have found out if we are related to anybody famous.

I don't know if she is being serious or not, but we are not related to anybody who is famous or infamous. I hope that this does not disappoint her.

Post by **Anne H** » Mon Feb 16, 2009 4:41 am

Sounds like an excellent idea, Sheila, and if you are as disorganized as I am, then you're niece might be with you long enough to really get the genealogy bug.

Regards,
Anne H

Post by **joette** » Mon Feb 16, 2009 2:35 pm

For a minute I thought I had posted by accident.My niece is bugging me but not about family history.
Originally her wedding date was set for May but they decided "why wait" & two weeks ago decided to bring it forward to this Friday(20th).
Everything is organised just about-not helped that she is marrying in a different location to where all my side of the family live & her parents are in Thurso.So it's been musical e-mails & phone calls & frantic "what do you think of this then"?
It does mean they are missing out on all the falladaralles but they are pretty down to earth & practical folk.
I had planned to present them with a family tree but as it is so quick will not.
They are marrying in the same Church she was baptised in & is her groom's Ward.Thank goodness for family & good friends who are doing the photos & the setting -up.
Sorry for going -off topic but I finally thought I had lost it! Oh & pray for good weather no snow on Friday over the Central belt of Scotland!
It does mean I do not have the wedding cake to make either so it's really a win/win for me.

WilmaM · Post by **WilmaM** » Mon Feb 16, 2009 2:53 pm

joette wrote:.
pray for good weather no snow on Friday over the Central belt of Scotland!

Why no snow?
I was married in a March and I had a White Wedding - with snow!!!!!! it made a talking point and interesting photos.

I wish them well.