Please remove if it's not allowed.....but it's funny

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STUARTDALGLEISH
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Joined: Fri Jan 28, 2005 7:57 pm
Location: PAISLEY

Please remove if it's not allowed.....but it's funny

Post by STUARTDALGLEISH » Fri Feb 20, 2009 11:22 am

Hardy Scots.........

50º F - 10º C

People in Southern England turn on the Central Heating .
People in Elgin plant out bedding plants

40º F - 4.5º C

Southerners shiver uncontrollably
Glaswegians sunbathe on the beach at Largs

35º F - 1.5º C

Cars in South of England refuse to start
People in Nairn drive with the windows down

20º F - -6º C

Southerners wear overcoats,gloves and wooly hats
Aberdonian men throw on a T shirt; Edinburgh girls start to wear mini-skirts

15º F - -9º C

Southerners begin to evacuate to the continent.
People from Dundee swim in the River Tay at Broughty Ferry

0º F - -18º C
Life in South grinds to a halt
Inverness folk have the last BBQ before it gets cold

-10º F - -23º C
Life in South ceases to exist
People in Dunfermline throw on a light jacket

-80º F - -62ºC
Polar bears wonder if it's worth carrying on
Boy Scouts in Oban start wearing their long trousers

-100º F - - 73º C
Santa Claus abandons North Pole
People in Stirling put on their longjohns

-173º F - - 114º C
Alcohol freezes
Glaswegians get upset because all the pubs are shut

-297º F - - 182º C
Microbial life starts to disappear
The coes in Forres complain about farmers with cold hands

-460º F - -273º C
All atomic motion stops
Shetlanders stamp their feet and blow on their hands

-500º F - -296º C
Hell Freezes over
SCOTLAND WILL SUPPORT ENGLAND IN THE WORLD CUP !!!!!!!
LOOKING FOR JACK, CAMERON, HISLOP/HYSLOP, DOWDS/DODD, ROSS, ROSE

SarahND
Site Admin
Posts: 5647
Joined: Thu Apr 27, 2006 12:47 am
Location: France

Post by SarahND » Fri Feb 20, 2009 1:39 pm

:lol: :lol: I remember seeing something similar contrasting Minnesotans with people in some southern state in the U.S. There's just enough truth to it to make it funny!

Cheers,
Sarah

JustJean
Posts: 2520
Joined: Sun Dec 12, 2004 12:52 am
Location: Maine USA

Post by JustJean » Fri Feb 20, 2009 1:52 pm

:lol: We have a few Maine jokes along those lines too.....perhaps it's the Scottish hardiness in all of us... :wink:

Best wishes
Jean

SarahND
Site Admin
Posts: 5647
Joined: Thu Apr 27, 2006 12:47 am
Location: France

Post by SarahND » Fri Feb 20, 2009 2:08 pm

Hi Jean,
It's 9 degrees out this morning (that's about -13 for you celsius folk), up from 5 yesterday. Care to go for a swim? I think we could find a place where the ice has cracked enough to get in :lol: :lol: :lol:

[cheers]
Sarah

emanday
Global Moderator
Posts: 2927
Joined: Tue May 30, 2006 12:50 am
Location: Born in Glasgow: now in Bristol

Post by emanday » Fri Feb 20, 2009 3:10 pm

Love it Stuart, especially as I always get a good laugh at the way things down here grind to a halt with the first sprinklings of a wee bit snow.

The recent fall of the white stuff in Bristol caused chaos, putting even some of the buses off the road!
[b]Mary[/b]
A cat leaves pawprints on your heart
McDonald or MacDonald (some couldn't make up their mind!), Bonner, Crichton, McKillop, Campbell, Cameron, Gitrig (+other spellings), Clark, Sloan, Stewart, McCutcheon, Ireland (the surname)

HeatherH
Global Moderator
Posts: 700
Joined: Mon Feb 28, 2005 10:30 pm
Location: Nova Scotia ,Canada

Post by HeatherH » Sat Feb 21, 2009 4:46 am

Funny you should post this just now as I had just received this in an email from a friend in Maine.

COLD IS A RELATIVE THING. .


65 above zero:

Floridians turn on the heat.

People in Maine plant gardens.


60 above zero:

Californians shiver uncontrollably.

People in Maine sunbathe.


50 above zero:

Italian & English cars won't start.

People in Maine drive with the windows down..


40 above zero:

Georgians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats.

People in Maine throw on a flannel shirt.


35 above zero:

New York landlords finally turn up the heat.

People in Maine have the last cookout before it gets cold.


20 above Zero

People in Miami all die.

Mainers close the windows.


Zero:

Californians fly away to Mexico .

People in Maine get out their winter coats.


10 below zero:

Hollywood disintegrates.

The Girl Scouts in Maine are selling cookies door to door.



20 below zero:

Washington DC runs out of hot air.

People in Maine let the dogs sleep indoors.


30 below zero:

Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.

Mainers get upset because they can't start the Snow-mobile.


40 below zero ):

ALL atomic motion stops .

People in Maine start saying...'Cold enough fer ya?'


50 below zero:

Hell freezes over.

Maine public schools will open 2 hours late

Quite a few chuckles there.
Heather
Looking for ...but not limited to Haldane ,Keir ,McLauchlan ,Walker ,Torrance , Reid ,Clark ,Johnstone ,Holmes ,Laurie ,Lawrie ,Strachan , McIlwee ,Welsh ,Queate ,Stewert ,McNight ,Steele ,Cockburn ,Young ....whew! That's more than enough for now.

Anne H
Global Moderator
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Joined: Sat Apr 30, 2005 5:12 pm
Location: Scotland

Post by Anne H » Sat Feb 21, 2009 5:53 am

Heather wrote:
65 above zero:

Floridians turn on the heat.

People in Maine plant gardens.
Heather, I can well relate to this one. :lol: My heat will automatically turn on in about half an hour...it's 69 above zero here but I'm freezing. :shock: I can't remember what the temperature is going to drop down to but we're even going to get some patchy frost, so it's going to be cold! :shock: :shock: ...aye, I know...you all feel sorry for me. :roll:

Regards,
Anne H

STUARTDALGLEISH
Posts: 145
Joined: Fri Jan 28, 2005 7:57 pm
Location: PAISLEY

Post by STUARTDALGLEISH » Sat Feb 21, 2009 3:04 pm

Anne

Make sure it's a bit cooler in May, I'm playing golf and would have to drink lots of beer to keep cool. Looking forward to zooming through the Sunpass Tolls!!
LOOKING FOR JACK, CAMERON, HISLOP/HYSLOP, DOWDS/DODD, ROSS, ROSE

Anne H
Global Moderator
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Joined: Sat Apr 30, 2005 5:12 pm
Location: Scotland

Post by Anne H » Sat Feb 21, 2009 4:04 pm

Oh dear...not sure if we can keep it cool in May, Stuart, I think you'll just have to try to endure drinking lots of that beer. :lol: :lol:

Actually, the temperature must have been in the 40's outside last night, but inside the house it was only 69. Absolutely beautiful outside this morning...lovely and sunny at a very pleasant 70 degrees....this is more like it! :)

Yell out hello as you're zooming through those tolls and enjoy the golf. :lol:

Regards,
Anne H