Piss Poor & Brass Monkeys

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Alan SHARP
Posts: 612
Joined: Tue Apr 06, 2010 9:41 pm
Location: Waikato, New Zealand

Piss Poor & Brass Monkeys

Post by Alan SHARP » Sun Dec 26, 2010 9:27 pm

Greetings to those fascinated by history.

These two insights have been emailed to me within the last few days. Neither carry any credits, so take them as you will, but they make fascinating reading. The first was supplied by my “Best man” all those years ago, and who has resided in Australia these past 30 years. The second by a SHARP from my Maternal lines.

Where did Piss Poor come from? Interesting History…. \:D/

They used to use urine to tan animal skins, so families used to all pee in a pot & then once a day it was taken & sold to the tannery.......if you had to do this to survive you were "Piss Poor"

But worse than that were the really poor folk who couldn't even afford to buy a pot.....they "didn't have a pot to piss in" & were the lowest of the low.

The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn't just how you like it, think about how things used to be. Here are some facts about the 1500s:

Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and they still smelled pretty good by June. However, since they were starting to smell . ..... . Brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odour. Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting married.

Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it. Hence the saying, "Don't throw the baby out with the Bath water!"

Houses had thatched roofs-thick straw-piled high, with no wood underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof. When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof... Hence the saying "It's raining cats and dogs."

There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house. This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could mess up your nice clean bed. Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. That's how canopy beds came into existence.

The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt. Hence the saying, "Dirt poor." The wealthy had slate floors that would get slippery in the winter when wet, so they spread thresh (straw) on floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed in the entrance-way.

Hence: a thresh hold.

In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire. Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day. Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while. Hence the rhyme: Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old. Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special. When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off. It was a sign of wealth that a man could, "bring home the bacon." They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around and chew the fat.

Those with money had plates made of pewter. Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning death. This happened most often with tomatoes, so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.

Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the upper crust.

Lead cups were used to drink ale or whiskey. The combination would sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial. They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up. Hence the custom of holding a wake.

England is old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they realized they had been burying people alive. So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the graveyard shift.) to listen for the bell; thus, someone could be saved by the bell or was considered a dead ringer.

And that's the truth....Now, whoever said History was boring!!!


CANNON BALLS!!! DID YOU KNOW THIS?

It was necessary to keep a good supply of cannon balls near the cannon on old war ships. But how to prevent them from rolling about the deck was the problem.
The storage method devised was to stack them as a square based pyramid, with one ball on top, resting on four, resting on nine, which rested on sixteen.

Thus, a supply of 30 cannon balls could be stacked in a small area right next to the cannon. There was only one problem -- how to prevent the bottom layer from sliding/rolling from under the others.

The solution was a metal plate with 16 round indentations, called, for reasons unknown, a Monkey. But if this plate were made of iron, the iron balls would quickly rust to it. The solution to the rusting problem was to make them of brass, hence, Brass Monkeys.

Few landlubbers realize that brass contracts much more and much faster than iron when chilled. Consequently, when the temperature dropped too far, the brass indentations would shrink so much that the iron cannon balls would come right off the monkey.

Thus, it was quite literally, cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey.

And all this time, folks thought that was just a vulgar expression?


Alan SHARP.

johnniegarve
Posts: 126
Joined: Thu Mar 18, 2010 11:57 am

Re: Piss Poor & Brass Monkeys

Post by johnniegarve » Mon Dec 27, 2010 4:31 pm

Alan, I think the Threshold refers to the practice of using the passageway in longhouse type farms, as a threshing floor on wet days. The outside door opened into the passage which had another door/window opposite, this could be opened, allowing a through draught to facilitate winnowing. Grain for the house was stored on the sheaf, these would be threshed a couple at a time, with a flail, then winnowed & ground on a quern. The doorstep was the threshold.

Lindsay
Posts: 53
Joined: Sat Dec 01, 2007 4:09 pm

Re: Piss Poor & Brass Monkeys

Post by Lindsay » Mon Dec 27, 2010 6:39 pm

I've read various articles/sites previously which debunk the "facts" claimed in that "bad old days" chain e-mail. Don't know if they are true or false but it makes interesting reading:
http://historymedren.about.com/od/daily ... d_hoax.htm
http://www.history-magazine.com/facts.html
Lindsay

Alan SHARP
Posts: 612
Joined: Tue Apr 06, 2010 9:41 pm
Location: Waikato, New Zealand

Re: Piss Poor & Brass Monkeys

Post by Alan SHARP » Mon Dec 27, 2010 7:32 pm

Greetings Lindsay.

Thanks for the link, it makes for interesting reading. I wrote 'take them as you will' as I did not agree with them all, though saying that, those who rely on rain water, and experience dry spells, could understand the bath one. Under eves tanks do not provide enough fall for a gravity feed shower, in one level dwellings, especially when the tank/s were low.

Our family of four would all use the same water, in turn, in a shallow bath with just a bowl of clean rince water before alighting. Either parent would bath the baby, on their lap, in six to seven inches of water. The rest would follow.

Alan SHARP.

Currie
Posts: 3924
Joined: Fri Jun 22, 2007 3:20 am
Location: Australia

Re: Piss Poor & Brass Monkeys

Post by Currie » Tue Dec 28, 2010 1:28 am

Just about everything has been debunked except for the Brass Monkey. I more or less believed the old brass monkey, cannon ball story until I went searching in Google Books and the old newspapers for early, cannon ball era, references, and couldn’t find any. Here’s something interesting. http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/cold ... onkey.html

“The Royal Navy records that, on their ships at least, cannon-balls were stored in planks with circular holes cut into them - not stacked in pyramids. These planks were known as 'shot garlands', not monkeys, and they date back to at least 1769, when they were first referred to in print.”

More here http://home.vicnet.net.au/~rasigsau/brass_monkey.htm

There’s more about ‘shot garlands’ in “The British Mariner's Vocabulary”, 1801, and there don’t appear to be any monkeys resident there. http://books.google.com.au/books?id=N1B ... 22&f=false

Here’s a Monkey and Ball story that is absolutely true, from the Birmingham Daily Post (Birmingham, England), Monday, September 8, 1890.

GAMBLING WITH A MONKEY.
At the Barnet Petty Sessions, on Friday, three men named George Smith, Frank Chambers, and James Donovan were charged with gambling at Barnet Fair.—It was shown that the three prisoners were seen by police officers in Barnet Fair gambling, the mode being that they sold tickets bearing a number, and then got a monkey they owned to pick out of a box a ball bearing a number. The person holding a ticket bearing a corresponding number to that on the ball took 10d. out of 1s. paid for the ticket, the remaining 2d. being what the defendants termed their commission on the transaction.—Detective-inspector Bannister contended that this was gambling, it being a game of chance. The prisoners had confederates who always got the winning numbers.—For the defence it was contended that the game was not one of chance, and that there could be no cheating, as only the monkey handled the balls.—Mr. Parkes ordered the defendants each to pay 8s., including costs, or in default undergo seven days' imprisonment.—The police wished to know whether the box, balls, and monkey would be forfeited or not.—Mr. Parkes said the box and balls would be forfeited and destroyed. The monkey would be given back to the defendants.

All the best,
Alan

Alan SHARP
Posts: 612
Joined: Tue Apr 06, 2010 9:41 pm
Location: Waikato, New Zealand

Re: Piss Poor & Brass Monkeys

Post by Alan SHARP » Tue Dec 28, 2010 3:55 am

Alan,
you can be relied upon to hunt out interesting material. What I was attempting to do was make researchers stop and think. It’s all too easy to try and conceive the researched material in today’s terms, life styles etc. As an example, in home (dwelling) sanitation has dramatically changed, post WWII, particularly in the rural areas

Prior to that, it was not uncommon for homes to have no permanently installed bath or shower, wash/laundry house (including boiling facilities) and toilets. They were detached amenities, or even communal amenities.

Any one familiar with a cue stick would know how to corral balls.

Re your gambling, newspaper charge, clip;
I find it odd (though I’m not superstitious) that the accompanying email that came with the others I posted, involved a display of six playing cards of face values 6, 7 & 8, asking you to select one then scroll down.

Then up pops a shuffled set of five cards being a mixture of 6, 7 & 8’s the missing one representing (correctly), the one you had singled out in your mind, before scrolling down. No matter how many times you scroll down, the card you select WILL NOT be in the five displayed.

HOW COME ? A pack of cards has 12 cards numbered 6 7 or 8 and as ALL five in the second set are not in the first set, you are supposed to be the WINNER, but not until you understand the deception.

Alan SHARP.

PS Alan, for my money keep them coming. Let the moderators give me a wrist tap, if they feel we are digressing too far.